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September Jokes and Trivia
According to the Georgian calendar, September is the ninth month. But, on the Roman calendar, it was the seventh month. September has had 29 days, and 31 days; but, since the time of the emperor Augustus, it has had only 30 days.
September is one of the warmest months in the Southern United States. Northern states have warm September days, but the nights get much cooler. It is also harvest time for crops. And, in Switzerland, it's called Harvest Month.

September 14, 1814 - Francis Scott Key wrote "The Star Spangled Banner" which later became our national anthem

Had It Rough at School?
add your rough school story!

You went to school? You had clothes? We went right from the womb to the uranium mines. 12-hour shifts. And, at the end of that 12-hour shift you'd move over to the diamond mine for a 12-hour shift. It might have been ok if we had been given tools, but those were for the rich kids. It didn't matter anyway, because there was only one hand for the whole block. And if you got the hand the day you didn't have the arm, well that was your tough luck. I still remember that one Christmas when the mine owners just hit us with lead pipes for 22 hours straight instead of making us dig. Man, that was sweet.

You had it easy. When I was younger, "grades" didn't exist. You either passed or failed, and if you failed they shot you. And it was at least a hundred miles to campus, and we hadn't even evolved legs yet so we just kind of rolled both ways. Uphill, of course. And snow? Wow, that would have been a blessing. Acid rain, baby. You'd put on several layers of clothes and just hope that you got there fast enough that it wasn't all melted away by then. And our attackers weren't just ice weasels, they were saber-toothed ice weasels. And I could only dream about rocks being added to the menu. Man, the next generation had it so good.

Pfft. Don't tell me about having it rough. I would have killed to go to school in an acid rain downpour. When I was in college, meteors the size of buildings would crash down upon us as we were on our way to class...on the next continent. We didn't have any skin protection back in those days, so we had to squirm up the hill completely naked while leaches attacked us. Class was a 6 straight hours of beatings with a stick by our professors, to which we were required to say, "Thank you" with each and every blow. And the professors were the saber toothed ice weasels with poisonous laser beams that shot out of their eyes.

You had schools? Lucky dogs. Back in my day we had to find a smart person and follow 'em around all day. If he or she didn't like what you said, you'd get smacked in the nose with a mace. And don't even talk to me about walking, that was a luxury where I came from. Most of use couldn't afford your fancy legs, we had to pull ourselves along with our fingers and the roads were made of broken glass.

You had smart people? Quit complainin'. In my day we were barely walking upright on that 12 mile hike to the uranium mines. And we'd have killed for some acid rain to cool down the lava fields we had to walk across, dragging our knuckles the whole way. And if we got there late or the foreman was in a bad mood, he'd make us roll around in his poisonous thorn bushes, then send us back home.





The United States Military targets a minimum IQ score of 85
50% of people have Intelligence Quotient scores between 90 and 110
2.5% of people are very superior in intelligence (over 130)
0.5% of people are near genius or genius (over 140)

'"The trick to education is to teach people in such a way that they don't realize they're learning until it's too late."

Monthly Observences
Chicken Month (National, US)
Childhood Cancer Awareness Month
Children's Good Manners Month
Cholesterol Education Month
Food Education Safety Month
Little League Month (National, US)
School Success Month (National, US)
Weekly Observences
3rd Week Constitution Week:
The Congress, by joint resolution of February 29, 1952 (36 U.S.C. 106), designated September 17 as "Citizenship Day," and by joint resolution of August 2, 1956 (36 U.S.C. 108), requested that the President proclaim the week beginning September 17 and ending September 23 of each year as "Constitution Week." For more information, please visit The White House website.
4th Week Banned Books Week - Celebrate Your Freedom to Read! September 25–October 2, 2004
For more information, please visit the American Library Association website.
Gemstone: Sapphire
Flower: Morning Glory


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Today's
Birthdays:
Barry Gibb (1946)
Boxcar Willie (1931)
Edgar Rice Burroughs (1875)
Lily Tomlin (1939)
Gene Colan (1926)
Johann Pachelbel (1653)
 
 



 

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