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Annoying
Singers
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Possibly the most subjective of all our categories,
the most annoying singers may very well turn out to be among
the greatest vocalists ever. The performers listed below are
singers that you probably noticed immediately upon hearing
his or her voice. We are not listing poor song selections
like when Leonard "Mister Spock" Nimoy sang Proud
Mary, or when Bing Crosby sang Hey Jude. We have
left "personal politics" out of this section as
well. (You're welcome, Ms. Streisand!)
This section is also not for bands who never should have been
in a recording studio, like the Shaggs or Styx. (Just kidding
about one of them. You decide which!) A distinctive vocal
ability can can be a curse or a blessing. Both to the singer
and the listener.
This category was suggested by a visitor, and, of course,
we welcome your suggestions and input via e-mail!
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Ethel
Merman (1908-1984) sang such hits as "There's no Business
Like Show Business" and "Everything's Coming Up Roses".
Ethel Agnes Zimmerman was born at 359 4th Avenue in Astoria,
Queens, in her grandmother's house. She has been called the
loudest woman in show business, and she probably was!
"I can never remember being afraid
of an audience. If the audience could do better, they'd be up
here on stage and I'd be out there watching them."
Irving Berlin said, "You'd better not write a bad lyric
for Merman because people will hear it in the second balcony."
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Macy
Gray - The first time I heard Macy Gray song on the radio, I
thought a baby was singing. Well, not really. I suppose I though
she was a toddler.
When I first saw her on television, I thought she was a Saturday
Night Live parody of a 1970s black entertainer.
That being said, she has nearly won a Grammy, sells millions
of CDs, is well respected in the music community and was featured
in the first Spider-man movie! |
Neil
Young - Neil is probably the most prolific rocker-who-can't-really-sing
on our list. Oddly enough, his "Best Of" 2 CD set
"Decade" was one of the first CD's I bought as I entered
the 21st century and got a CD player. I just like the guy's
music! Crosby, Stills and Nash have really nice harmonies, but
I just can't get myself to buy any of their albums that end
without "and Young".
This daring rocker has experimented with rock-a-billy as Neil
Young and the Shocking Pinks, well as "new wave" electronic
music on his "Trans" album, but just try to find them
on CD, or even vinyl! |
Michael
Bolton - When it comes to our "worst of" category,
the phrase "... and anything by Michael Bolton" comes
up a lot.
Anyone who ticks off that many music lovers must be doing something
right!
Michael is probably the biggest selling "yelling"
singer, and seems like a nice enough guy when I see him on talk
shows. |
Jimmy
Durante - Jimmy Durante (1893-1980) is probably best known to
today's audience for singing the theme from TV's 1969 "Frosty
the Snowman" holiday cartoon. In his live shows, he thanked
an old friend with "Good night Mrs. Calabash, wherever
you are" at the end of each performance.
There is much debate as to why he thanked her. In keeping with
our goal of maintaining a "PG" rated site, we'll let
you decide for yourself what that "thank you" was
all about. He also opens the Sleepless In Seattle soundtrack
with "As Time Goes By". |
Sting
- I loved this guy in the Police. Since leaving the band, his
voice has degraded into a barely distinguishable warble.
His new style is defined by his baying (at the moon?) in his
song, Desert Rose. Here is a snippet of the lyrics...
I dream of rain I dream of gardens in the desert sand I wake
in pain I dream of love as time runs through my hand I dream
of fire...
He yodels all that in about six syllables. I dream of the day
he gets back with his old band. |
Joe
Cocker - Joe's voice defines the term "gravelly",
and he was a big hit at Woodstock in 1969 with his version of
the Beatles' With A Little Help From My Friends. He is probably
best known for his solo hit You Are So Beautiful, along with
his duet with Jennifer Warnes, Up Where We Belong. Another hit
is the stripper-esque You Can Leave Your Hat On.
He survived the usual 60's performer drug and alcohol abuse
and now lives on a 160 acre ranch outside of Crawford, Colorado,
with his lovely wife, Pam. They run the Mad Dog Ranch Fountain
Cafe. |
James
Brown - Haugh! - As comedian Eddie Murphy once pointed out,
that's a James Brown lyric. JB has been called the Godfather
of Soul, and the hardest working man in show business.
In his day, he really was. I see him dancing and think of a
Black Elvis. In reality, he truly brought stage performance
to a new level, and all of today's energetic singer/dancers
owe a piece of their success to Mister Brown. |
Ringo
Starr - Although the least-appreciated Beatle while they were
together, Ringo captured a dozen Top 40 solo hits, exceeded
only by George, who had 15! For thoses of you keeping score,
John and Paul each have had 7 solo hits so far. (story)
Ringo's unusual collection of hits included the No No Song,
Back Off Boogaloo and a cover version of You're Sixteen, in
which Paul McCartney played the kazoo.
Ringo also starred in the vastly underrated 1981 film, "Caveman".
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Mariah
Carey - It has been predicted that Mariah would soon acheive
album cover full frontal nudity, as she appears to be wearing
fewer clothes with each passing CD release. Her break-up with
EMI records may have slowed the pace down, but many experts
believe that she'll redouble her efforts with her next record
deal.
While she has an incredible vocal range, and was the top selling
artist of the 1990s, she has recently been using that voice
to create new sounds instead of singing new songs. She could
easily fall off this list if she would start singing songs again.
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