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Worst
Songs Of All Time!
As Suggested by Pop Culture Madness Visitors!
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My nominee for worst ever?
Does anyone remember "Sylvia's Mother"
by Dr. Hook and the Medicine Show?
If you do, my condolences.
Blessings - Shadowluna |
Cats in the Cradle by Harry
Chapin. What a stupid, lame, feel sorry for me song. So
he turned into a self-centered ass just like his pathetic
old man .... wow. What a surprise ending. His life would
have been so much better if his stupid old man had tossed
the ball around when he was nine. Hey ... I have an idea
.... stop crying ... you baby. Well I mean if you weren't
dead.
-MEF |
Sad to confess, but I agree with
most of the above. Funny how many of the all-time favourite
songs also appear in the worst song selections. With some
songs you just love 'em or hate 'em! Ballads that don't
work are always the worst (full of pretentious insincerity).
After my little ramble I feel I must add Don McLean's
Vincent to the list. It's sadder (in every way)
than American Pie. What a dreary dirge. No more
starry, starry nights please.
-Bazz, UK. |
"Liquid Dreams" by O-Town-Please
name drop more. All their fans are like eight.
- dcappiello6165 |
I couldn't leave this website
without offering my contribution:
(Not necessarily in order)
1) "Let Her In" John Travolta (His acting
and singing abilities are about on the same level.)
2) "Everybody Have Fun Tonight" Wang
Chung (The most laughable party song ever written. Plus
the music video can cause epilleptic seizures.)
3) "Sing" The Carpenters (Believe it
or not, I'm actually a Carpenters fan, but even I can't
stand to listen to this sappy "Sesame Street"
reject.)
4) "Not Yet a Woman" Britney Spears (I
heard this song once…it was one time too many.)
5) "Sailing" Christopher Cross (He won
a Grammy for Best New Artist of 1981, beating out the
Pretenders. I have had no use for the Grammys since.)
6) "I Will Always Love You" Whitney Houston
(Was that an ambulance coming up the street, or was that
the last 60 seconds?)
7) "98.6" Keith (Share your health secrets
with us, Keith, 'cause your wimpy song is making me sick
to my stomach!)
8) "She's Out of My Life" Michael Jackson
(I believe it was this point where Michael gradually started
losing his soul.)
9) "The Warrior" Scandal ("Shooting
down the walls of heartache/Bang-Bang!" Oh-kay.)
10) "Let's Hear It For the Boy" Denise
Williams (R & B music was at its worst in the early
1980's. This is one shining example.)
-Darryl B |
I would have to say that the worst
tune of all time is "Love Me Tender"
by Elvis. If you check out the sheet music it says words
and music by Elvis. Did anybody ever hear of "Aura
Lee" (Traditional). That's the exact same melody
of LMT. So when I get a request to play LMT I ignore it
and play "Aura Lee".
Ciao- Joe M |
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I disagree with Loving You because
it was written for her newborn daughter; therefore,
it is a sweet song to a child. I half way disagree with
Muskrat Love. As done by the Cap and Ten, it
is awful. But it was originally written and performed
by Willis Alan Ramsey and was a song to his young niece
(or that's how I heard it). As such, those can be the
two of the world's worst recordings, but worst songs,
I disagree. I also disagree with I Am, I Said,
because it actually has intelligent lyrics. And what
is wrong with Midnight at the Oasis? Maria Muldaur
has one of the best voices and delivery of our time.
I don't even know "I've Never Been to Me."
Proof that music today is disposable is
the fact that people still know most of the songs on
your list though they are 20-30 years old. Not one bad
song (except maybe Charlene) from the past 5 - 15 years
has made it--and there were some really bad ones--Hanson,
Brittany, InSync, Backstreet Boys. Why? Because no one
even remembers those song or even listened to them in
the first place!!!
One of the rules for the "worst"
list is that it has to have some kind of staying power,
even if it is the "worst".
Time will tell, if today's artists will some familiarity
with the next generation of music fans!
-Music Guy
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Dear Friends,
Whether some of these are "so bad they're good"
I leave to you to decide:
10. Ballad of the Green Berets
-- Staff Sgt. Barry Sadler
9. Games People Play -- Spinners [hate that false
falsetto]
8. Why -- Frankie Avalon
7. Too Much Too Little Too Late -- Johnny Mathis/Deniece
Williams
[insipid AND un-believable]
6. Julie Do Ya Love Me -- Bobby Sherman
5. Ain't No Mountain High Enough -- Supremes/Temptations
[that much
overproduction HAS to be lame]
4. Drip Drop -- Dion [lacked the depth of his
"Donna the Prima Dona,"
which also inexplicably made the Top Ten]
3. Louie Louie -- Kingsmen
2. Surfin' Bird -- Trashmen
1. They're Coming To Take Me Away -- Napoleon
XIV
Appreciatively,
Lewis W
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Agree with many of the comments
made but I am compelled to nominate the following;
Anything by that doyen of naffness Cliff Richard - after
forgiving him for his Christmas offerings which even at
Christmas isn't easy
Especially bad and in no particular order:
- The Spice Girls - Wannabe is that the title
? whatever has been said about this record being symbolic
of girl power it is still gut wrenchingly awful!
- Kylie and Jason - Especially For You. Keep
it please, does for duets what Hitler did for international
relations
- Will Young - Light My Fire. Totally unprovoked
attack on the work of a late, great rock and roll
legend.
- Dean Freidman - Lucky Stars Just demonstrates
what can be done when you combine sickening lyrics
with a thoroughly nasty melody and sing them badly
- Art Garfunkel - Bright Eyes, a song about
a dead rabbit, need I say more?
There are more I'm sure but this is just too painfu
-lJonH
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Having My Baby -- Paul
Anka
Happer Valley P.T.A - Jeannie C Riley
Gypsys, Tramps and Thieves -- Cher
I Am Woman -- Helen Reddy
Delta Dawn -- Helen Reddy
- Mehrens |
| If you want a REALLY bad song,
listen to "Who Let the Dogs Out?" by
the Baha Men. I'm sure we all remember this one... every
"beepin" freshman in high school thought it
was "cool." This is an unbelievably over-rated,
kiddie MTV (aka Nickelodeon post 1998) butt-kissing, repetative,
mind-blowingly annoying terd of a song. |
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"Escape (The Pina Colada Song)"
by Rupert Holmes --it is easily the most insipid song
I've ever heard. It's essentially the predecessor to
modern newspaper personal ads.
ANYTHING by Concrete Blonde. All their
stuff is so depressing that it makes me want to go and
slit my wrists, down a bottle of sleeping pills, shoot
myself in the head AND jump off a cliff into a pit of
rabid alligators. I would rather puncture my eardrums
with a rusty nail than listen to ANYthing by this band
EVER again.
Val in Raleigh NC
Editor's note: Tell us how
you Really feel!
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Holy crap! Everyone forgot about
Don't Worry, Be Happy by Bobby McFerrin! How many
times did I want him to worry about me coming after him
for such an indiot song? Geez!
Beernuts |
Helen Reddy's "You and
Me against the World" makes me violently, violently
ill. I also despise the musical stylings of Chuck Mangione
and his noxious flugelhorn, particularly the chunder inducing
"Feels So Good" which I m quite positive
is the soundtrack to hell. Here are a few more in no particular
order.
Styx "Babe"- I'd rather eat lightbulbs,
crap glass shards and wipe with a
lemon peel than listen to this swill.
Ohio Express "Yummy Yummy Yummy"- Makes
me want to barfy barfy barfy
Will To Power "Baby I Love Your Way/Freebird"-
Managed to turn two classics
into one big load of bland, confectionary, cookie cutter,souless,
elevator
goop.
Stevie Wonder "I just called..." Stevie
Wonder is a musical genius but this
is a great big sticky sweet steamin' pile.
I tried not to mention some that had already been listed
(McArthur Park may be the worst ever of all times regardless
of era or genre) Enjoy the site.
-TJ |
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From Issac:
One of the songs I really find annoying is "All
I wanna do is have some fun" by Sheryl Crow, its
horrible, the beat line. Agh!
...But that classic
wordage!
"I like a good beer buzz early in the morning
And Billy likes to peel the labels
From his bottles of Bud
He shreds them on the bar
Then he lights every match in an oversized pack
Letting each one burn down to his thick fingers
before blowing and cursing them out ..."
Well, maybe you're right!
-Music Guy
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From BRUNO-
I've read through the pages and agree with a lot of
the selections that
people have submitted, so I'm gonna try and add a few
that I didn't see
already:
1. Story of a girl - nine gays. I hate this song
more than life itself. If there is no god or hell, and
i knew that i could gettaway with it, I would seriously
hurt.... ahh forget it.
2. When you're lost - Matchbox 20. This band
makes me want to pull out all my hair. Hate is not nearly
strong enough a word.
3. Russians love their Children - Sting. What
a complete wanker Sting is.
This is one of the corniest songs I've ever heard. Somebody
should tell him that he doesn't matter and never did.
4. The Flame -Cheap Dick. Loathesome.
5. These Dreams - Heart. "Go on when i close
my ey-yyyesss..." I remember being subjected to
this nausea everyday on the schoolbus.
6. Broken Wings - Mister Mr. Terrible band, terrible
name even worse song. The eighties SUCKED THE BIG ONE!!!!
7. Arms Wide Open - Creed. If there's andy justice
in the afterlife these
boneheads hopefully will have to spend eternity listening
to their wretched
vomit.
8. Heterosexual man - the Odds (i believe that's
their name) Just listen to
the lyrics...
".I wanna make every woman I see, Maybe make a
make a baby with me, Cause I'm a heterosexual man"
9. Cherry Hill Park- Billy Joel Royal
"Now in the daytime Mary Hill was a teaser
Come the night she was such a pleaser
Mary Hill was such a thrill after dark, in Cherry Hill
Park"
A song about a slut in a park, how inspiring!
10. Melting Pot -Blue Mink "take a pinch
of white man - wrap him up in black skirt"
BTW I always get a tremendous kick outta
Richard Harris doing MacArthur
Park. I know it's a terrible song but I just can't
bring myself to hate a song about a cake left in the
rain.
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Before going into a song list, here is
a list of some performers that either always were 'worst'
or have 'jumped the shark' years ago and simply SUCK
today:
Michael Jackson - Jumped the shark after the
'Bad' album. It has been all downhill ever since.
Mariah Carey - Another shark jumper:
It is painfully clear that the sole reason she was successful
as she was was because of [her ex-husband, former Sony
Music president] Tommy Mottola. In her defense, she
DOES have a great voice and good writing skills, but
once she got free from the golden grip of Mottola's
exclusive creative control, she decided that she was
more in tune with her 'ghetto' roots than with the Mottola/Afanasieff
pop-diva songs, the irrefutable proof of which can be
seen from 'Butterfly' onward. IMO, her attempt
to run the whole operation completely by herself led
to the now-infamous breakdown and subsequent dismissal
from her then-new EMI contract.
Avril Lavigne - What a POSER!!
Claims that she is different from the likes of Britney,
Christina, et al by not using sex to sell songs, yet
is seen wearing ties with the words 'Orgasm Donor' on
them... Claims she is unlike the aforementioned 'Divas'
because she 'actually writes her own songs'... Well-
she may write a line or two (or all of the lyrics in
'Sk8r Boi', as they are obviously the product of someone
17 or younger), but the real writing is done by a group
of producers known only as 'The Matrix' (shades
of the 'Tin Pan Alley' days and the 'Crew' and 'Corporation'
at Motown, no?)... Avril the second coming of 'Punk'?
I think not. She didn't even know who the frickin' RAMONES
or SEX PISTOLS were when asked about songs by both of
these groups in an interview... GAG! Her fan base will
grow up, as did the NKOTB and Tiffany fans, and she
will be the stuff of people's childhood memories...
Neil Diamond - Jumped the shark
in the mid-70's when he got super-schmaltzy. Give me
the old Bang and MCA/Uni albums anyday!!! I would see
him live if I ever got the chance, though.
In no particular order, Here are some
of the individual songs on MY 'worst' list:
I Try - Macy Gray: This *ahem*
'singer' *cough* has a voice that sounds like nails
on a chalkboard, even when just plain speaking!! OMG
this is bad!!!!
Just A Friend- Biz Markie: I have
heard VERY BAD karaoke singers that can sing ol' Biz
off the face of the earth!!! How this sold piles of
records is a mystery to me.
Old Time Rock & Roll - Bob
Seger & The Silver Bullet Band: The unofficial 'Wedding
Reception Theme Song', It is one of the few tunes that
compels me to RUSH to the radio and change the station.
Oh, Pretty Woman - Roy Orbison:
Another one that has been overplayed to death, causing
the radio station to change in a big hurry... Van Halen's
cover is only slightly more passable...
Sometimes When We Touch - Dan Hill:
Imagine Dan Fogelberg on Quaaludes and in love. ZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...
I Think We're Alone Now [Tommy
James & The Shondells] - Tiffany
I Saw Him Standing There [Beatles] - Tiffany
I Feel The Earth Move [Carole King] - Martika
Red, Red Wine [Neil Diamond] - UB40 (originally
released in 1983 but bombed, was reissued and became
a huge hit in 1988)
Rock On [David Essex] - Michael Damian: The late
1980s were when George Tobin and his product du jour
called 'Tiffany' opened the floodgates for some of the
nastier covers of otherwise great songs [as recorded
by the original artists]... This trend continued into
the early 90's until 'sampling' took it to a whole new
level- Why do a cover when we can just rip off the song
outright, loop it, add a couple new bass notes, rap
or sing a little over it, and make a whole new hit song
with it?
Groove Is In The Heart - DEEEE-Lite:
The first couple times this wasn't THAT bad... Unfortunately
it has a very short shelf life.
Drive - The Cars: Another one that
initiates a grab for the tuning knob on the radio...
The Cars are a great band, but this is sooooooo gaggingly
glurgy... :P
There are many others I could go on listing
all night....
-MovieTech
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Sara-Starship
I heard this song a quarter of a million times while
riding in the car on
the way to Florida back in '86. To this day, it gives
me sick, depressed
feeling whenever I think about it.
Metallica-Enter Sandman
Aside from the fact that this song ushered in the cataclysmic
end of the
Metallica everyone had grown accustomed to during their
awe-inspiring thrash
years, this song is just silly anyway. The lyrics are
nothing but a
laughable retread of boogey man cliches.
Beautiful-Christina Aguilera
Another unbelievably cliched song that translates into
nothing deeper than a
"sticks and stones will break my bones, but names
will never hurt me"
message. This is a nauseatingly vain attempt at building
credibility with
angst-ridden teens. Garbage.
American Idols-God Bless the U.S.A.
A blatant attempt to exploit a zombified music-buying
public's patriotism
and simple-mindedness becomes a blatant attempt to exploit
a zombified
music-buying public's patriotism and simple-mindedness...
AGAIN!
R.E.M.-Crush With Eyeliner
Every song off the wretched album "Monster"
was a pretentious, failed
excursion into a cool and heavy musical territory that
was grossly
uncharacteristic of anything R.E.M. could ever hope
to achieve. "Crush With
Eyeliner" stands out because of the really stupid
name.
Live-Freaks
When I first heard this song on the radio, I was amazed
at how terrible it
was. It seemed that the band was deliberately trying
to get the listener to
turn off the radio in horror. Everyone I talked to about
it got the same
impression.
Paul McCartney-No More Lonely Nights
Here's another song that fills me with an empty feeling
whenever I have one
of those bad 80's music flashbacks. I saw the video
on MTV way too many
times and still find myself singing it every now and
again for no reason I
can think of.
Jefferson Starship-Out of Control
Probably in the running for the worst video I've ever
seen. Luckily I
caught it for the first time on VH-1 classics last year
instead of back in
the 80's when it first came out or it would have definitely
left a black
mark on my young psyche.
Jennifer Lopez-Love Don't Cost A thing
I think "Can't Buy Me Love" said it
all forty years ago. I'm glad that
Jennifer Lopez doesn't charge anything for her love,
but why does she have
to sing a song about it? Maybe her and Christina Aguilera
can get together
and do a whole album of hackneyed, self-serving "meesage"
songs. I'm sure
there a couple of four-year olds out there who still
need to be enlightened.
Pink Floyd-The Fletcher Memorial Home
I hope no one who hasn't heard Pink Floyd before ever
hears this song.
There will be no way of getting them to listen to anything
by Pink Floyd
ever again.
Temple of the Dog-Hunger Strike
Soundgarden and Pearl Jam are good bands, but when the
lead singers got
together for this song, something went terribly wrong.
Hearing Eddie Veder
sing "I'm going hungry" followed by Chris
Cornell repeating it in a
screaching voice over and over again does not a good
song make. It's just
pretentious early nineties alternative-hippie music
anyway.
Chad Hoolihan
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Hi- stumbled across the Worst Songs
website while looking for something else. Is it too
late to submit my list? Assuming it's not, here, in
no particular order, and at the risk of dating myself,
it goes-
Pretty Woman by Roy Orbison. Like
having a root canal done over and over and over...
Wichita Lineman by Glen Campbell. "Searching
in the sun for another overload.." "I hear
you singing in the wire.." Um, OK.
Ode to Billy Joe by Bobbie Gentry. The concept
for this should have been thrown off the Tallahatchie
Bridge.
Anything by Delaney and Bonnie. With or without
friends.
Anything by The Supremes. Every seven weeks or
so they would release what was essentially the same
song, over and over and over...
American Pie by Don McLean. I originally liked
the colorful imagery and historical references, but
after hearing it 97,000 times a week for weeks on end
I grew to seriously hate it.
Bad to the Bone by George Thorogood. The title
says it all.
Knock Three Times by Tony Orlando and Dawn. I
was in the service at the time. We made some pretty
raunchy modifications to the lyrics.
Ballad of the Green Berets by Barry Sadler. "Fearless
men who jump and die.."? Is that any way to win
a war? More raunchy lyrics mods.
Pina Colada Song by Rupert Holmes. This was just
plain nauseating. Can't put my finger on Why; it just
was.
Anyway, my $.10. Thanks for listening.
Joseph
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