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A tourist wanders into a back-alley antique
shop in San Francisco's Chinatown. Picking through the objects
on display he discovers a detailed, life-sized bronze sculpture
of a rat. The sculpture is so interesting and unique that
he picks it up and asks the shop owner what it costs. "Twelve
dollars for the rat, sir," says the shop owner, "and
a thousand dollars more for the story behind it."
"You can keep the story, old man," he replies, "but
I'll take the rat." The transaction complete, the tourist
leaves the store with the bronze rat under his arm. As he
crosses the street in front of the store, two live rats emerge
from a sewer drain and fall into step behind him.
Nervously looking over his shoulder, he begins to walk faster,
but every time he passes another sewer drain, more rats come
out and follow him. By the time he's walked two blocks, at
least a hundred rats are at his heels, and people begin to
point and shout.
He walks even faster, and soon breaks into a trot as multitudes
of rats swarm from sewers, basements, vacant lots, and abandoned
cars. Rats by the thousands are at his heels, and as he sees
the waterfront at the bottom of the hill, he panics and starts
to run full tilt.
No matter how fast he runs, the rats keep up, squealing hideously,
now not just thousands but millions, so that by the time he
comes rushing up to the water's edge a trail of rats twelve
city blocks long is behind him. Making a mighty leap, he jumps
up onto a light post, grasping it with one arm while he hurls
the bronze rat into San Francisco Bay with the other, as far
as he can heave it.
Pulling his legs up and clinging to the light post, he watches
in amazement as the seething tide of rats surges over the
breakwater into the sea, where they drown. Shaken and mumbling,
he makes his way back to the antique shop. "Ah, so you've
come back for the rest of the story," says the owner.
"No," says the tourist, "but
I was wondering if you have any bronze lawyers!"
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