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December 20th Joke and Trivia

Every Christmas morning, when my kids were little, I read them the nativity story out of the big family bible.

When my son was old enough to talk, he asked me what a stable was.

I thought for a moment how to explain it to him in terms he could understand, then told him, "It's something like your sister's room, but without a stereo."


Life's Lessons I've learned...

I've learned that I like my teacher
because she cries when we sing "Silent Night".
Age 6

I've learned that our dog doesn't want to eat my broccoli either.
Age 7

I've learned that when I wave to people in the country,
they stop what they are doing and wave back.
Age 9

I've learned that just when I get my room the way I like it,
Mom makes me clean it up again.
Age 12

I've learned that if you want to cheer yourself up,
you should try cheering someone else up.
Age 14

I've learned that although it's hard to admit it,
I'm secretly glad my parents are strict with me.
Age 15

I've learned that silent company is often more healing
than words of advice.
Age 24

I've learned that brushing my child's hair
is one of life's great pleasures.
Age 26

I've learned that wherever I go,
the world's worst drivers have followed me there.
Age 29

I've learned that if someone says something unkind about me,
I must live so that no one will believe it.
Age 39

I've learned that there are people who love you dearly
but just don't know how to show it.
Age 42

I've learned that you can make some one's day
by simply sending them a little note.
Age 44

I've learned that the greater a person's sense of guilt,
the greater his or her need to cast blame on others.
Age 46

I've learned that children and grandparents are natural allies.
Age 47

I've learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today,
life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow.
Age 48

I've learned that singing "Amazing Grace" can lift my spirits for hours.
Age 49

I've learned that motel mattresses are
better on the side away from the phone.
Age 50

I've learned that you can tell a lot about a man
by the way he handles these three things:
a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights.
Age 52

I've learned that keeping a vegetable garden
is worth a medicine cabinet full of pills.
Age 52

I've learned that regardless of your relationship with your parents,
you miss them terribly after they die.
Age 55

I've learned that making a living is not the same thing as making a life.
Age 58

I've learned that if you want to do something positive for your children,
work to improve your marriage.
Age 61

I've learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance.
Age 62

I've learned that you shouldn't go through life
with a catcher's mitt on both hands.
You need to be able to throw something back.
Age 64

I've learned that if you pursue happiness, it will elude you.
But if you focus on your family, the needs of others,
your work, meeting new people, and doing the very best you can,
happiness will find you.
Age 65

I've learned that whenever I decide something with kindness,
I usually make the right decision.
Age 66

I've learned that everyone can use a prayer.
Age 72

I've learned that it pays to believe in miracles.
And to tell the truth, I've seen several.
Age 75

I've learned that even when I have pains, I don't have to be one.
Age 82

I've learned that every day you should reach out and touch someone.
People love that human touch -
holding hands, a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back.
Age 85

I've learned that I still have a lot to learn.
Age 92




How To Confuse Santa

 


December 20th Brthdays:
Dick Wolf (1946)
Peter Criss (1945)
Uri Geller (1946)
Irene Dunne (1898)

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