| Celebrities
Born Today: < |
Fred Berry (1951-2003)
Neil Sedaka (1939)
Adam Clayton (1960)
Dana Delany (1956)
L. Ron Hubbard (1911)
Charo (1941)
Danny Masterson (1976)
Donald Duck (1942, so he claims) (Actually Donad
Duck was born on June
9, 1934)
Louis Chauvin (1881-1908, Age 27)
William H. Macy (1950)
Emile Hirsch (1985) |
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| How
can you tell if someone is a communist? |
"If
it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, and quacks like a duck,
it's probably a duck"
-Walter Reuther's test to find a communist. |
| March
13th's Joke: |
A (Generically Funny Minority) stormed up to the front desk
of the library and said,
"I have a complaint!"
"Yes, ma'am?"
"I borrowed a book last week and it was horrible!"
"What was wrong with it?" asked the librarian.
"It had way too many characters and there was no plot whatsoever!"
The librarian nodded and said, "Ahhh. You must be the person
who took our phone book." |
Golfer:
"Well, I have never played this badly before!
Caddy: "I didn't realize you had played before, sir." |
| Klingon
For Dummies... |
"Qapla" (KKAa Plah)
- Goodbye, with wishes of succes |
| 13
Questions For March 13th: |
Would
a fly without wings be called a walk?
Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone
will clean them?
If a stealth bomber crashes in a forest, will it make a sound?
If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?
If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right
to remain silent?
Why do they put Braille on the drive-through bank machines?
How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign?
Why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?
Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste
funny?
What was the best thing before sliced bread? |
