|
A guy goes to walk into a fancy nightclub, and the doorman
says, "Sorry, but you have to have a tie, any kind of
tie, a necktie, bow tie, whatever."
The guy goes back out to his car, and all he has is a
pair of jumper cables. He ties them in a bow around his neck,
goes back up to the door of the club, and says, "Is this
okay?"
The doorman says, "Ok, you can come in, but don't
start anything."
A Scout Master was teaching his boy
scouts about survival in the desert. "What are the three
most important things you should bring with you in case you
get lost in the desert?" he asked.
Several hands went up, and many good ideas were suggested such
as food, matches, etc.
Then one little boy in the back eagerly raised his hand. "Yes
Timmy, what are the three most important things you would bring
with you?" asked the Scout Master.
Timmy replied: "A compass, a canteen of water, and a deck
of cards."
"Why's that Timmy?"
"Well," answered Timmy, "the compass is to find
the right direction, the water is to prevent dehydration..."
"And what about the deck of cards?" asked the Scout
Master.
"Well, Sir, as soon as you start playing Solitaire, someone
is bound to come up behind you and say, "Put that red nine
on top of that black ten!"
A
centerpiece for the table should never be anything prepared
by a taxidermist.
Do not allow the dog
to eat at the table...no matter how good his manners are.
|