(Links)

► Will 60 gallons be suffficient?
► Finding half a worm.
► Its People! Soylent Green is people!
► Orange you glad I didn't say banana?
► Not enough sand
► I'll have whatever she's having!
► I thought you said goat!
► I'm a frayed knot!
► A stick
► How he got into my pajamas I'll never know
► New Jersey got to choose first.
► so I bit him
► Time to go to the dentist
► First Base!
► I said SOCKET not SPROCKET!
► May I mambo dogface to the banana patch?"
► Officer, you have donut breath!
► He must be fine, he stopped yellin' yesterday
► Tooth-Hurty
► and THAT's why the angel sits on top of the Christmas Tree
► Elvis Parsley
► I saw the last guy coming back with watermelons!
► My face and yer butt► Dang! I mean your face and my butt! yeah.
► Where did my ice collection disappear to?
► Because 7 ate nine!
► You can tune a piano, but you can't tune a fish
► Don't cry, its only a joke!
► Aren't you glad I didn't say orange?
► Sure, let me hold your monkey.
► So the Tooth Fairy said "Twenty Bucks, same as in town"
► You know the rules, no arms no cookies.
► OK, you're ugly too!
► because it is to far to walk
► Wheee!
► then you are a mile away and he has no shoes
► OK, I give up, where's the boat?
► Why the long face?
► Because it was stapled to the chicken.
► Tomato Paste! (that always cracks me up!)
► So did I. I just didn't think he'd do it again.
► I'm talking to the dummy!
► Then it would be a chicken sedan!
► FIRETRUCK!
► I guess blond guys aren't too smart either.
► Those aren't pillows!
► You can't use a pitchfork to unload a truckload of bowling balls.
► To get to the second hand shop!
► The Aristocrats!
► Noone expects the Spanish Inquisition!
► "Hey lady," said the parrot, "You know"
► A Puppy!
► You don't bury survivors!
► The (Generic Funny Minority) would stop and ask for directions.
► Bubble Gum
► Neither, they both weigh a ton!
► It was all in one string.
► Sitting down.
► It tastes just like a Spotted Owl, your honor.
► I have turtle recall
► Recked 'em? Darn near killed 'em!
► A Penny!
► All of Ken's stuff.
► silence!
► "Put the Frosted Flakes back in the box"
► It was stapled to the chicken
► Does this taste funny to you?
► Nothing
► You have a sprained finger!
► under where?
► He wanted to see time fly
► "I can tell from here that you're not eating right!"
► Take my wife, PLEASE!
► 37!
► Time to get a new fence
► A newspaper
► She ran away from the Ball!
► He made his own lunch!
► You pull the pin and throw it back!
► A beer and a mop!
► I'm pregnant.
► I was talking to the duck

There was a man who got into a car accident.
He was soon rushed to the hospital. The left side of his body was completely paralyzed.
► The doctor said, "He was going to be all right."

Then there's there's the BUTTER joke►
► but we don't want to spread it.